The Deeds of Schrodel

Nov 17th, 2014

The Deeds of Schrodel

While I was thinking about the cats tonight, I suddenly remembered something amusing I wrote several years ago while I was still a corporate drone who dreaded every day at work. One day I really really didn’t feel like getting up, but Schrodi persuaded me – this was how. You can tell from the description that this was a long time ago btw from the mention of ‘cigarette ends’ in the bowl – back more than five years ago when I was an unreformed and unrepentant smoker. Also the fact I had a Blackberry at the time must date it….

These were the deeds of Schrodel in attempt to get Marion out of bed between 7:15am and 7:45am.

1. Attempt to oust Tora from radiator bed from bottom – times six.
2. Attempt to oust Tora from radiator bed by jumping on windowsill from the side – unsuccessfully – times four.
3. Attempt to oust Tora from radiator bed by jumping on windowsill from the side – successfully but see 4 below.
4. Breaking bowl Marion has had since she was 14 in attempt to achieve 3 above.
5. Pushing all cigarette ends formerly contained in said bowl above down back of radiator one at a time.
6. Howling loudly in ear – times approx eight
7. Pushing blackberry off windowsill.
8. Pushing Russian doll off windowsill and scattering pieces of same all over floor.
9. Scratching bottom of bed while howling – times at least four.
10. Suddenly attacking Marion’s feet while distracting her by performing 9 above.
11. Attempting to push water glass off table.
12. Attacking Tora in radiator bed by jumping on him from above

After achieving success in his deeds by 12 above – the said Schrodel stayed in the radiator bed for approx two minutes and then went out.

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